The Start of Something Interesting...

[lastonepercent]

The day was calm, with no recent Decepticon attacks, and none suspected to be incoming for some time.  The cons were too busy licking their wounds from the last battle, one that the Autobots had decidedly come out ahead on.  The celebrations had gone on long into the night and the recreation room was already a mess.

Thus, it was the perfect chance for a lone Autobot to slip casually outside.

Mirage had no shift currently scheduled, so he was free to spend his time as he pleased.  He certainly made no move to hide his departure, greeting his comrades in the halls on the way out, but the box in his hands remained unopened despite any passing curiosity.  It was quietly shifted into subspace before long, and  the former noble shifted into alt mode just as smoothly when he reached the doors.  Despite the completely inappropriate earthen race car mode, the mech had little trouble self-adjusting before driving off into the forest covering the mountain, for business unknown...

Comments

[cliffjumper]

He couldn't help grimacing at the mention of the possible differences and another realisation of why he'd rather not do this popped up; all the slagging nonsense about etiquette and proper behaviour and whatnot.

What the rusted scrap did he even know about things like that!?

"I'd be more worried 'bout stupid noble pedantry and scrap," Cliffjumper rolled his optics, but for all that was almost teasing... and then froze, optics widening as his processor actually caught up with what this actually meant.

"This is stupid! Like I know slag about stuff like that," Cliffjumper burst out and for once, regardless of the way he'd phrased it, wasn't angry at Mirage, or even said noble nonsense - only that he didn't actually know it (not that he wanted to) and that it was sort of necessary.

This did seem to be like it was supposed to be a right proper diplomatic mission, which meant it'd be happening on a different level completely than what Cliffjumper was familiar with.

[lastonepercent]

Mirage sniffed, barely fighting the urge to take true offence to the slight against his own culture - he could tell that it was meant as a joke, after all.

"You hardly have to pretend to fit in with all that. Making you out to be a noble on top of everything else would be foolish and doomed to failure."

Mirage waved a hand, attempting to preemptively block any possible indignant outbursts.

"One cannot fake a lifetime of upbringing with just a week to prepare, after all. No, you will be who you are and where you are from. The only thing we are faking is your slightly greater experience with all things Sensitive and 'spiritual', and the bond."

He calmed a little, venting deep and hard. It really, really wasn't Cliffjumper's fault. He had to remember that.

"You will do your best and memorize the data given to you, and they in turn should be relatively understanding, provided they do not figure out the spark of the ruse. Really, few minor flubs with the cultural etiquette are to be expected with the first contact between worlds. Especially when the 'bonded Sensitive' is not a trained diplomat. It's the mistakes of major Priest matters - things that I know that you seemingly do not - which may get us into trouble."

[cliffjumper]

"Oh." Relief washed through him at that, open and fierce. That didn't do anything for the vague thought that he'd probably mess up at some point, but it was underscored by the petty petulance that they could take it.

... not that he might not feel embarrassed, as well.

"Yeah, yeah. Ya don't have to fraggin' grind it in!" Cliffjumper waved what felt like a command off with a gesture of his hand, trying not to let the annoyance at Mirage's commandeering get to him. Trying and probably failing at least somewhat.

"... you sure me not knowin' anything 'bout diplomacy not gonna mess something up?" Cliffjumper finally asked, frowning.

It wasn't like he would want to totally ruin their chances or anything, if the Paradrons showed to be genuine. Nevermind all the sensitive stuff. Why did he need know anything about that?

Cliffjumper was pretty sure he'd find out soon.

[lastonepercent]

Mirage frowned at the other mech, helm tilting in thought even as he was relieved. At least the minibot was giving it some consideration.

"Cliffjumper. While there is no telling if there is some tiny, little thing the Paradrons may take massive offence to - something that neither of us may be able to avoid - so long as you use your head we should be fine."

Mirage leaned back in his chair, limbs splaying out in a brief stretch.

"After all, we will be doing our best to prepare you. The datapad has enough of the basics, while we will be going over the rest. Just try re refrain yourself from insulting anyone or making any off-color jokes. Essentially: if you think that anyone could possibly be offended by a comment you might think to make, simply refrain. And politeness, even feigned, goes a long way in such dealings."

[cliffjumper]

"... I suppose," Cliffjumper said, grumbling a little as he looked away. He was pretty sure his temper was more of an issue than his common sense or even any jokes he might make.

He wasn't exactly prone to joking around after all, especially not with people he didn't know.

Kicking the berth, Cliffjumper refrained from snapping anything about keeping from making comments might be the actual hardest thing. He was pretty sure Mirage (and everyone else) knew that.

He was also pretty sure Mirage would probably have taken pretty much anyone else but him along on this if he could choose. Not that he felt particularly offended by that; there were at least a handful Cliffjumper was pretty sure were far more qualified by experience and knowledge for something like this than he was.

"Easy peasy," Cliffjumper said with a roll of his optics, the English term feeling somewhat odd through his vocaliser and in his mouth, but he felt it encapsulated his slightly churlish feelings about the whole thing.

Then he just sighed and grunted, giving the berth another kick.

"... so what do I need to know 'bout the whole sensitive stuff? Why do I even need to know more? I mean, ain't it enough that you're... uh, apparently bonded to someone who's sensitive?"

[lastonepercent]

Cliffjumper really was one of the last people Mirage would have picked for this, both because of attitude and willingness.

He'd rather have someone who had wanted to come along, after all. Dragging the minibot along wasn't something he enjoyed, despite the need.

"As for the 'sensitive stuff'...just basic things aught to cover it."

Mirage frowned, trying to keep his - very negative - opinion on all this under control.

"The most basic terminology and iconography is a must- I can prepare a datapad for that easily. Certain interpersonal greetings. The hardest part, however, will be the basic rituals - both you being exposed and used to to them, and your role in them.."

[cliffjumper]

Cliffjumper was well aware of how much Mirage exactly didn't want to tell him anything of this, and some small part was pettily pleased. The rest was sympathetic... and annoyed he'd have to learn things he didn't actually want to learn.

He was pretty slagging sure nothing that would be considered "necessary" for this would actually help him with his actual... "talent".

"Always what I wanted, go back to school..." he probably should've kept that and his snort to himself, but he couldn't help it. It wasn't a dig at Mirage, just... the situation in general.

Then he paused, staring.

"What? Ya mean that's... would have been something that'd have been happening, being part of rituals too?" He didn't like that idea, mostly because, like Mirage said, it'd be really hard to fake knowledge and familiarity with something like that than just (hopefully) terminology and iconography.

Cliffjumper, in some part of his processor, grimaced around the mental pronunciation of that word, annoyed he'd have to even get passingly familiar with it. The rest was more focused on something that seemed far more daunting.

[lastonepercent]

Mirage snorted, more amused than derisive; the 'going back to school' description was apt, even if his willingness to do the 'schooling' was lacking.

"Well yes."

Mirage tilted his helm, openly confused by the fact that Cliffjumper even had to ask.

"Especially if there was a bond to the head priest. We may not have the requirements the Paradrons do about that bonding nonsense, but it would not only be polite and helpful, but also likely be enjoyable, to share such a thing."

[cliffjumper]

"Guess that makes sense," Cliffjumper said but couldn't exactly help grimacing as he rubbed the back of his helm, before he paused, hand dropping slowly back to his lap, "enjoyable though? How?"

He just couldn't see how the thing - accidental or not - he'd ended up in the middle of could be enjoyable.

... Pretty, he supposed, if you just got used to it, but it'd been overwhelming and sort of, just a little, he could admit, scary.

[lastonepercent]

"You mean, aside from the whole 'working with one's partner' portion of it all?"

A shrug.

"Because I assume that is a large part of it right there by itself."

Mirage tried to keep his stare serious, but a faint twitch at the corner of his lips could not be suppressed entirely.

"It is a religious experience, for one. Which, for a Priest, should be enjoyable on it's own. The larger ones often involving a great deal of...positive sensations and field charges, and that's not counting any sexual angles a rite may take."

[cliffjumper]

Well, there was that. Cliffjumper shrugged as well at that; he hadn't really thought of it that way, but, presumably, if everybody was interested and willing and you cared about the person you worked with, it would be enjoyable.

Cliffjumper ended up grimacing at that slight twist of Mirage's mouth, but he didn't really take offense.

"... Right. Really?" Cliffjumper frowned in thought, pushing away that comment about sexual angles. He wasn't thinking any closer about that. Nope. Did doing rites like that really come with positive sensations and whatever?

[lastonepercent]

"Well, yes," Mirage repeated, not sure if he should be amused or simply exasperated at this point. He supposed he should be glad Cliffjumper was showing a more positive interest at all.

"You may have been lost to the trance in the last rite, but surely you did notice that it was at least far from uncomfortable?"

He frowned; perhaps Cliffjumper had not gone in as deeply as he had thought?

"Most rites and rituals are supposed to bring peace or connection, after all."

[cliffjumper]

"I was far too fraggin' surprised and confused to notice much of anything else, Mirage," Cliffjumper said with a snort and a roll of his optics. He'd also, honestly, been somewhat... just a little, maybe, scared when things he had no idea what they were started to happen

Like slag was he going to say anything about that to Mirage, however, and even admitting this much was a bit embarrassing.

"Guess that makes sense, though. You'd have to be real fanatic 'bout doing slag if it was unpleasant or some other scrap like that." Sure, there'd probably be those who'd subject themselves to more than just some unpleasantness if they got enough recompense, but that wouldn't count for everybody, and certainly not for as many as had once been involved in the religious orders, Cliffjumper was rather sure.

[lastonepercent]

"True," Mirage allowed grudgingly, trying and failing to remember his own first rite and how he might have felt.

He really only remembers awe and the overwhelming peace, but then again, he had been far more willing than the minibot.

"Well, there are some that can be unpleasant, in a sense-" his own marking ritual, for one- "But most are far too involved with more positive wavelengths to be painful."

And even then, the unpleasant ones were done with a sense of duty.

[cliffjumper]

Willing and knowledgeable and ready. Cliffjumper... had been none of that.

"Like the one I... uh. Interrupted." Cliffjumper squirmed and blushed, far too easily remembering what had happened and feeling the flush of shame. Though not at interrupting, not really.

He still wasn't ashamed of having interrupted what he thought was a bad situation, but he was obviously flustered over having interpreted things so very wrong.

Then he frowned, shifting in his seat for a far more different reason.

"What I'd be expected to do? Or know that I'd be expected to do, or what-the-frag-ever," waving a hand around in the end to try and encompass the rather tricky situation of things he "would" know, "should" know and "would" and "should" be used to as having been a feature in his life up to this point.

If they had been and were involved. Which they weren't.

[lastonepercent]

"Indeed," Mirage agreed, hiding a reluctant smile at Cliffjumper's reaction behind a hand. He didn't want to be amused at all this, which only made it all the worse.

"The most basic of basics, really. The introductory rites and procedures that even the most junior of acolytes would learn. No more than that."

Thankfully, that killed his amusement quickly enough. Any more that that and Prime himself would have to personally ask it of him first, and he still would't feel right about it.

"I can prep an intro-packet on datapad easily enough."

[cliffjumper]

Cliffjumper was, inexplicably, pleased at the smile he could see, even if Mirage made his best to hide it, and it teased out a lopsided grin of his own, however brief.

And brief it was considering the way Mirage's mood obviously took a dive, and Cliffjumper huffed, crossing his arms over his chestplating. He was annoyed, but at the same time, he supposed, he could understand why Mirage didn't like this.

Slag, he didn't want to know it, but even if it wasn't him, they might have had to go with someone else... Or Mirage would have had to fend off well-meaning "offers" the whole trip or something.

And that thought, however vaguely amusing very briefly, was also not pleasant, because well. Who'd want to deal with something like that?

"... Sorry." Staring at the wall to the left of Mirage, Cliffjumper grimaced. He had the feeling he would mess up, no matter how many times he read said datapad.

"Guess it doesn't help that I don't really wanna know it, huh?"

Since that had been Mirage's issue ever since they found out he was... sensitive.

[lastonepercent]

"No, not really."

Not at all, Mirage refrained from saying, biting back the snappy remark. He stretched his long frame, rolling his shoulders in faux nonchalance.

"But it is hardly your fault. I've allowed myself to be hoisted by my own struts, in this case."

It was the ambassadors, and his own.

[cliffjumper]

Apologetic or not, it was hard to hold onto the feeling when Mirage stretched and rolled his shoulders. Cliffjumper tried to look away, really, but he was stuck staring slightly angled at Mirage from the edge of his vision with his helm turned down slightly.

Mirage was, after all, very good looking, and while Cliffjumper might always scoff about the delicate lines and armour Mirage sported, the long, slender cut of him was distracting.

Very, very distracting, especially when he did that, and Cliffjumper had to duck his helm further and look away less his blush give him away, though the slightly stuttered, quiet reset of his vocaliser was probably... revealing.

Cliffjumper hoped not.

"Uh, well, think the ambassadors are kinda at rusted fault too, since if they hadn't found us, this wouldn't be happenin'," Cliffjumper offered with a snort, shifting in his seat on his berth.

The mini still wasn't sure if that was a good idea or not, though allies of any sort would obviously be a Primus-sent gift.

But if they actually were or might turn into allies, that was what Cliffjumper was doubting at all.

"We just gotta... get through this." Cliffjumper couldn't manage a smile, not even a half-hearted one, and a grimace slipped out instead. Not just because of what they were going to have to pretend and the fact that he didn't trust the Paradronians, but also...

Well, he sure hoped Mirage would still even vaguely tolerate him by the end of it all. Some small, tiny part was hoping for more, but it was ruthlessly squashed.

[lastonepercent]

"True. But then again, we wouldn't be in the midst of our chance to ally with a lost colony, either."

Another pop from resettling shoulders, before Mirage gave Cliffjumper a shrug.

"That will make it all worth it in the end."

It would have to. Giving Cliffjumper a lingering stare, Mirage nodded, resigned and serious.

"I'm sure we'll manage."

[cliffjumper]

"True," Cliffjumper muttered, "if that's even what they're gonna turn into..." grimacing, Cliffjumper fingered the datapad he'd been given. This was stupid, but it was happening.

They wouldn't, at least, be completely alone on Paradron, even if the Ark crew couldn't spare too many others either, which was understandable. They would, either way, be out-numbered.

On the other hand, none of the Paradronians were probably combat-trained, like the Autobots (and Decepticons) were, so there was that.

"Somehow, anyway," Cliffjumper agreed and rubbed the side of his helm, then looked back at Mirage, "you gonna sneak out of here the way you came?"

He wasn't sure what he thought about Mirage having sneaked here invisible, though.

[lastonepercent]

"Mhmm no," Mirage shrugged again as he stood up, heading toward the door. Palm on the exit pad, he turned long enough to flash Cliffjumper with a dimmed optic in a teasing wink.

"If we're supposedly 'involved', I imagine it doesn't matter if I am seen slipping out of here at all hours, now does it? I'll see you again for the launch - don't forget to memorize that data pad, and upcoming datapacket! I should have that ready for you by morning."

Chuckling, he stepped out into the hall, door whooshing shut behind him.