The Start of Something Interesting...

[lastonepercent]

The day was calm, with no recent Decepticon attacks, and none suspected to be incoming for some time.  The cons were too busy licking their wounds from the last battle, one that the Autobots had decidedly come out ahead on.  The celebrations had gone on long into the night and the recreation room was already a mess.

Thus, it was the perfect chance for a lone Autobot to slip casually outside.

Mirage had no shift currently scheduled, so he was free to spend his time as he pleased.  He certainly made no move to hide his departure, greeting his comrades in the halls on the way out, but the box in his hands remained unopened despite any passing curiosity.  It was quietly shifted into subspace before long, and  the former noble shifted into alt mode just as smoothly when he reached the doors.  Despite the completely inappropriate earthen race car mode, the mech had little trouble self-adjusting before driving off into the forest covering the mountain, for business unknown...

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[cliffjumper]

Groaning, he rubbed his faceplate. He had known that, of course. That was why he was here and everything, like Mirage had so kindly reminded him. But Cliffjumper was reluctant all over again by this dumb, embarrassing farce now that Mirage at least knew that he was attracted to him.

"Yeah, thanks. I didn't need the rustin' reminder." Grumbling, he crossed his arms over his chestplates and glowered at the door. Mostly so he didn't stare at Mirage.

"So... uh. What're we... expected to do?"

Or act like. Cliffjumper knew what normal couples did and whatever, but did that go here? Did that go for this sort of situation?

[lastonepercent]

"It is a more formal celebration, but less complex than most."

Mirage shrugged, using the distraction of arranging the gifts to fend off his irritation at Cliffjumper's tone.

"Unfortunately, I don't have all the details, as we have yet to finish going over the ways in which our rituals differ from one another."

He would have have to try and sneak in a viewing of an older Paradron ceremony recording before they left...

"You will have to be seated next to me, of course. I will do my best to inform you over closed comm if you have to do anything complicated, though it shouldn't be. If anyone hands you anything, you will be expected to pass it over to me; I hand you something, you pass it over; you bow your helm when everyone else will, etcetera. Simple things like that."

[cliffjumper]

"That... doesn't sound too hard," Cliffjumper said slowly, frowning at the floor. He'd honestly expected something more... difficult than that. But then maybe official things like this wouldn't really require them to pretend to be particularly close?

Cliffjumper wasn't sure whether he was relieved or frustrated - and embarrassed by his reaction either way, since it was just hours earlier he'd accidentally revealed at least some of what he thought about Mirage.

Looking up, he stared as Mirage fussed with the presents.

"That's the third time you're goin' through 'em, I don't think it's gonna get much better than that."

[lastonepercent]

Mirage's anxious hands stilled with a suddenness that sent one of the crystalline objects toppling into two others, spilling them across the polished countertop with a clatter.

"...Indeed."

He sighed, hands clenching and unclenching with irritation before he started the process with the gifts over again.

"Aside from all that, we will probably be expected to show some signs of our...'fidelity' to one another. I will have to research just exactly what that might be, as that part is, obviously, missing from pure Cybertronian rites."

[cliffjumper]

Cliffjumper twitched when the trinkets fell, then stiffened when Mirage mentioned showing some signs, and flexed his hands.

"Research? When in the name of Cybertron are ya gonna have chance to research? We have to leave soon, after all!"

Should they just default to what they, on Cybertron, would consider affection or... whatever 'signs of fidelity' fragging meant? Cliffjumper bit his lip and pulled his EM field tight when he realised that... did Mirage and he even share the same ideas of what would be considered proper displays of affection?

[lastonepercent]

Mirage harrumphed and tapped the side of his helm with the hand not busy with the trinkets.

"I am downloading a few public viewing records of older ceremonies right now. Perusing them internally for useful details won't take long."

He just hoped it wasn't anything too intimate. Cliffjumper would surely balk if they had to get too close this early on, crush or not.

"I'll send anything pertinent to you if I find it."

[cliffjumper]

"... they can't fragging expect us to do things their way, can they? We've just gotten here, and just 'cause you're goin' through this trouble don't mean it'd be something we'd be used to!"

He wasn't sure why that whole thing annoyed him - that Mirage seemed to be going above and beyond, or that it might be expected that he do so, in order for them to adjust their supposed usual behaviour to something the Paradronians might recognise.

It just rubbed him the wrong way.

Nevermind what they might need to do.

[lastonepercent]

"Cliffjumper," Mirage says, slowly, patiently, resisting the urge to swat all of his carefully arranged gifts right back off the table and to the floor.

"You are here because we have to do some things 'their way'. That is the entire reason you had to come at all."

He somehow manages to keep the vid files running in the back of his processor, and is so relieved by what he finds that he can even manage to keep his tone polite. It's a fake polite, but it is the best he can manage with his suddenly fraying temper.

[cliffjumper]

Tensing at Mirage's tone, Cliffjumper scowled. Not just because of the tone or what he was saying, but also because of the implications.

"Look, needin' to meet their fraggin' expectations of what a Flame of Cybertron, especially basically the head of the whole dumb thing anymore, is supposed to be and do, that's one blasted thing, but to rustin' expect the ways you show affection to be the same ain't just stupid, that's just... two-bit processor thinkin' and rude!"

Throwing his arms up in the air, Cliffjumper stomped over to the window to glare down at the city below. The whole thing was so fragging aggravating, even more so when Mirage now more or less knew he was, at least, attracted to the mech. That was just dangerous, but at least Mirage didn't seem to be about to do anything about it...

Which---

No. He wasn't going to think about what that meant.

[lastonepercent]

"Oh for goodness sake, there are only so many ways one can express affection anyway."

And he's just glad that anything more than a public kiss is on the list.

"Here," Mirage said abruptly, sending a file containing a condensed montage of ritual video Cliffjumper's way with the mental download equivalent of a shove. "I've timestamped everything for you. There is some displays of hand-holding and arm touching, but everything is quite tame for the event we are about to go to."

[cliffjumper]

"I know that, but that ain't my point, Mirage!"

Scowling, Cliffjumper accepted the file with ill grace, only reluctantly looking through it. It was simple and, yes, like Mirage had said tame, but suddenly the idea that they were now going to actually start to have to do things like this made Cliffjumper flush.

Up until now it'd all been theoretical aside from Mirage putting a hand on his shoulder or similar to push him along. This... even just something like holding hands would be something else.

"So we just gotta... make sure we do somethin' like that a few times tonight, or what? Or is there any sort of... procedure to it?" He even looked through the file Mirage had sent him again just to make sure there didn't seem to be anything like that, to him at least.

The only thing that was obvious was that, if he understood things right, that Mirage would be expected to initiate most of it. Probably as the higher-ranking individual. It made the minibot curl his lip a little.

[lastonepercent]

"Well unfortunately, we will just have to deal with it. Because that is how it is here. And yes there is," Mirage quickly corrected, spinning so sharply he nearly knocked the trinkets right over again.

"Check timestamps five, seven, and nine; see how the bonded is handed the items and passes them over to their mated priest? Note the hand clasp and forearm contact. It is the same when the priest passes the ritual items back over. Time stamp two: they start the ceremony with a hand resting on the priest's arm, as though escorting them in. Three and eight: ritual conclusion involves both hands clasped together over the flame chalis. And, of course, four and six."

Yes. The kiss.

It's barely more than a polite buzz of lip plates, but it is there, part way through the ritual.

[cliffjumper]

Cliffjumper sputtered a little more the further Mirage got in his recount; the first few things weren't too bad, really, but the last...

"Why're you lookin' at... at ritual slag anyway? I thought whatever we're going to tonight was just some sort of... reception or whatever the frag you'd call it?"

Anything to bring attention - and his thoughts - away from the fact that he might be getting that close to Mirage. Even if it could hardly even count as an actual kiss.

[lastonepercent]

Mirage blinked, momentarily confused as to why Cliffjumper had even asked the question.

"Well. Because it is a ritual? Or at least, an event that has an element of ritual for it. The clips I showed you are from events just like this one for other delegates from Paradron's local moons and colonies."

[cliffjumper]

"... Oh." Grimacing, Cliffjumper scrubbed his faceplates and wasn't sure whether he was annoyed or feeling embarrassed. "Why does everything gotta be a ritual anyway?"

Had he just missed something about how things were done at this level of society, or was it just that the Paradronians were way too obsessed with religion and ritual?

... Considering what they'd seen so far, it might be the latter, but that wasn't very encouraging, really.

[lastonepercent]

"Well, the Paradronians are very focused on rites and rituals," Mirage started, stepping away from the trinket table at last.

"And considering that they have decided to focus on my status as a priest, I am not surprised that they would be far more focused on it than they usually might be."

He shrugged. "We will just have to deal with it."

[cliffjumper]

"Yeah, kinda noticed," Cliffjumper muttered, "just our luck, endin' up with a colony founded by a bunch of hardcore believers or whatever."

They'd vaguely known this, of course, since Mirage had been the one the ambassador and her group had latched onto, aside from the Prime, but it was still annoying to Cliffjumper. Mostly from a sense of having something pushed on him that he didn't exactly like.

He didn't believe in atechnogenesis, but he'd never been too much into the whole... structured worship thing, either.

"Just keep me from embarrassin' myself..."

[lastonepercent]

"Indeed," Mirage agreed, "But that is how it happened to turn out. And it seems to have worked out in their favor so far..."

At least they weren't having a several thousand vorn civil war.

At Cliffjumper's request, Mirage managed a wry grin.

"That's the plan."

[cliffjumper]

"Ya know, I ain't sure it says any good about them 'cause they probably chose people who all believed the same way they did, so of course they ain't gonna have any rustin' problems like we've got..." Trailing off, Cliffjumper frowned, then scowled, up at the ceiling.

"... and I don't think I've seen any military-type altmodes so far. So ya know." Not the same friction as on Cybertron at all, and for some reason that both made Cliffjumper jealous and just annoyed, because they wouldn't be prepared at all if the 'Cons attacked them.

[lastonepercent]

"At least not until they have more time to form more divergent beliefs and separated provinces- but that is really getting ahead of ourselves. Let us just be glad that they are friendly despite it all and - so far - seem fairly unified and peaceable."

Mirage made a face at the implication that the Paradrons wouldn't put up a fight. He shook his helm, gesturing to the pair of them.

"Yes well, a lack of military-types doesn't mean much. After all, we Autobots largely lack them as well."

[cliffjumper]

"Unless they made sure that didn't happen," Cliffjumper muttered. Maybe he was being too cynical about this, maybe it was that they'd lived the last eight million and more years in peace that was rubbing him the wrong way and making him jealous... Maybe.

"I meant that they wouldn't have any of those to decide they wanna conquer the planet and turn it into their own playground and then start looking at other planets, like happened to us."

Because whatever other faults or quirks they had - cruel, arrogant and whatever else negative traits - it seemed far more to type that the military mechs were the ones who always looked to conquest as such.

[lastonepercent]

Mirage turned again, giving Cliffjumper a look.

"I've heard nothing of the sort. Speculate all you like, but keep it in your head until we get back. Allowing our hosts to catch a single whisper of such speculation would be a horrid insult at best.

Then he nodded, acknowledging Cliffjumper's observation.

"But that point about military mechs may stand. Just add that to the 'do not discuss' list - they may have military mechs in other parts of the planet that we have yet to see."

[cliffjumper]

"I wasn't gonna!" Cliffjumper scowled, throwing his hands up, "I've got some blasted tact, Mirage, even if ya probably don't believe that!"

Of course, if he got angry, it might be a moot point, but he hadn't actually planned on saying anything of those thoughts to anyone but Mirage - mostly since he was the only other person here that he could say those things to, since they were here alone.

But he really hadn't planned or thought about saying anything about that to any of the Paradronians, frag it all.

"When we leavin', anyway?"

Not that he was particularly interested in knowing, or in going on this thing, but better be prepared.

[lastonepercent]

"I know you 'wasn't gonna,' but being overheard is rarely intentional," Mirage replied waspishly, internally noting, once again, Cliffjumper's temper and the problems it could raise. He flapped a hand, gesturing vaguely toward Cliffjumper's helm.

"Just...keep it to comms, alright? And we'll be leaving as soon as the ambassador contacts us."

Which should be any moment now, really...

[cliffjumper]

"Not like I asked out in the middle of the corridor or somethin'..." Cliffjumper muttered, glowering up at Mirage but he did nod, no matter how annoyed he looked about it.

Of course he'd keep it to comms elsewhere. Though maybe he should've done that even in here, and Cliffjumper couldn't believe his usual paranoid nature had failed him in this... But Mirage had been aggravating him.

A lot.

"Right. Do I need anything else?" Cliffjumper said with a frown, gesturing down at himself and then around the room, a little aimlessly.